I recently decided (along with Joe too) that we are going to wait until we are 30 to start trying to conceive (I’m older by 4 months that’s why I say I decided). I just feel like we should have our debt a little lower than we have it now. It would just not be conducive to have a kid on the income/debt that we have right now. Also we just recently visited a friend of Joe's and his wife and they just had a little boy. Just watching all that goes into just a few hours of being around a baby, I thought to myself I couldn’t do this right now!
I asked Joe if he’s ready for that and he said no. I asked why do you say that (I wanted to know his reason) and he said because I enjoy it just being us right now and being able to up and go here and there). I totally agree. The other month I had to run errand one day for a friend’s wedding, had a gyno appt, and then had to go to a friend’s house to get ready for a wedding that night. I could not have done that with a baby being lugged around. I would not want to put a little thing through all that running around! That’s the day I decided after the appt that I should wait.
Somedays I wonder if I’ll ever be ready though- physically mentally and emotionally. I want to have a dog first so at least I know I can handle having a dog. But we need a house in order to have a dog (which I know we will have in time.)
I told Joe that I feel like my biological clock is ticking and if I wait too long it could get risky. I know it’s always risky but the older you get it does come with a risk.
I just wanted to share my thoughts if anyone wants to comment or offer advice I would love to take it. Thanks!
Monday, February 18, 2008
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Enjoy life to the fullest
I've been told don't take life so seriously. Enjoy it. Well sometimes that's hard for me. You see I'm a control freak. An organized to the tee control freak. I want to be able to have fun and relax but some things are hard. I worry about sooo much. I worry about money. I worry if we will ever get a house. I wonder if we'll ever be able to be on the right track to have a baby.
I remember in high school and college all I worried about was if my latest crush would ever like me or if I would ever get a boyfriend or even get married. I should have just got the heck out of college and got my MRS degree as one friend said one time. I shouldn't have even went to college if that's all I was concerned about- I hated studying and could never concentrate. I often say now that I think I have A.D.D. and that's why I could never concentrate. Ok back to the topic at hand. But if I wouldn't have gone to college to friends of mine maybe wouldn't have found each other.
I know I should start relying on God and let him deal with my anxiety because obviously He knows all and He knows what is going to happen. Sometimes I feel like I have to help things along or if I don't do this or that it won't happen. I am reminded of a passage in the Luke 12:21-23 that states- "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. 23Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes."
Life is more than things that we worry about. It is about serving people and having a close relationship with our Heavenly Father. I need to keep reminding myself of this when I worry about the future. Because I know who holds the future and that is the King of Kings the Lord of Lords and the God of the universe! He is my Heavenly Father! and I am His child. How wonderful is that!
I remember in high school and college all I worried about was if my latest crush would ever like me or if I would ever get a boyfriend or even get married. I should have just got the heck out of college and got my MRS degree as one friend said one time. I shouldn't have even went to college if that's all I was concerned about- I hated studying and could never concentrate. I often say now that I think I have A.D.D. and that's why I could never concentrate. Ok back to the topic at hand. But if I wouldn't have gone to college to friends of mine maybe wouldn't have found each other.
I know I should start relying on God and let him deal with my anxiety because obviously He knows all and He knows what is going to happen. Sometimes I feel like I have to help things along or if I don't do this or that it won't happen. I am reminded of a passage in the Luke 12:21-23 that states- "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. 23Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes."
Life is more than things that we worry about. It is about serving people and having a close relationship with our Heavenly Father. I need to keep reminding myself of this when I worry about the future. Because I know who holds the future and that is the King of Kings the Lord of Lords and the God of the universe! He is my Heavenly Father! and I am His child. How wonderful is that!
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Single Awareness Day becomes Valentines' Day
4 years and counting for me....
It's hard to believe that tomorrow will be Joe and I's 4th Valentines' Day together. Even harder to believe that it use to be my worst day of the year. I hated that day- aside from the fact that my parents would make me feel special and I would receive an arrangement or something and a card from them. That made me feel so much better since I was single. Single Awareness day I use to call it. The day once a year that singles are painfully aware that they aren't dating anyone. I use to try to get together with all my single friends and do something so it wasn't just a day full of roses or flowers and cards and chocolates and pink (oh how I love pink) and reds and people who showed how they love each other! Why not do that any other year? Gives Hallmark another day to produce things- cards, stuffed animals, etc. to get more revenue. Don't get me wrong I love the day now that I have found the one I want to spend the rest of my life with but I can do that any other day of the year.
So what are our big V-day plans??? Well honestly we both enjoyed the evening we had last yr when we had the Valentines' snow. So we are going to rent movies (I have buy one get one free from Blockbuster's emails) and then we are ordering chinese. Then snuggling together enjoying each other's company. Saturday we are going to my family's church for the Valentines' Day party- we are having stuffed shells (my mom is making some), red velvet cake and playing some themed games and enjoying the fellowship there. I can't wait! I love spending time with those people!
Well I hope everyone has a wonderful day tomorrow and enjoys the love from their loved ones!
God Bless!
TK
It's hard to believe that tomorrow will be Joe and I's 4th Valentines' Day together. Even harder to believe that it use to be my worst day of the year. I hated that day- aside from the fact that my parents would make me feel special and I would receive an arrangement or something and a card from them. That made me feel so much better since I was single. Single Awareness day I use to call it. The day once a year that singles are painfully aware that they aren't dating anyone. I use to try to get together with all my single friends and do something so it wasn't just a day full of roses or flowers and cards and chocolates and pink (oh how I love pink) and reds and people who showed how they love each other! Why not do that any other year? Gives Hallmark another day to produce things- cards, stuffed animals, etc. to get more revenue. Don't get me wrong I love the day now that I have found the one I want to spend the rest of my life with but I can do that any other day of the year.
So what are our big V-day plans??? Well honestly we both enjoyed the evening we had last yr when we had the Valentines' snow. So we are going to rent movies (I have buy one get one free from Blockbuster's emails) and then we are ordering chinese. Then snuggling together enjoying each other's company. Saturday we are going to my family's church for the Valentines' Day party- we are having stuffed shells (my mom is making some), red velvet cake and playing some themed games and enjoying the fellowship there. I can't wait! I love spending time with those people!
Well I hope everyone has a wonderful day tomorrow and enjoys the love from their loved ones!
God Bless!
TK
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
The start of something new but old
So most of you know that I love to write. I have written stories, poems, tons of letters, newspaper articles,etc. I haven't journaled everyday since fall of 2004 and as lately as June 2006. Why? Why have I let something I'm so good at and that is so therapeutic be left behind? Who knows. But I know somedays it's easier to type out my feelings than sit down and write. Maybe someday I'll sit down and make it more of a habit to write in written form but this will suffice for now.
In Tara's news today: I hope that I get off from work early because of the snow and ice. I would rather be at home relaxing with Joe. Plus I hate driving in that stuff. Kids get out of school so quickly today- lucky ducks. I would love to stay home and bake cupcakes or something. I saw on Martha today some wonderful strawberry cupcakes that I could make- yummy!
Joe and I are good for anyone who's wondering. We are trying to save up for a house but somedays I feel like we are rendered helpless and will never get one. God knows all and we are resting in his arms knowing that His plans are not ours- what a humbling experience! The other night on our drive home from my parents I asked him as I always ask him the hard hitting questions to get inside his head- Why do you want a house as bad as I do? His reply? - so we can start having babies (said with a smile). I chuckled to myself- what a sweet guy!
In Tara's news today: I hope that I get off from work early because of the snow and ice. I would rather be at home relaxing with Joe. Plus I hate driving in that stuff. Kids get out of school so quickly today- lucky ducks. I would love to stay home and bake cupcakes or something. I saw on Martha today some wonderful strawberry cupcakes that I could make- yummy!
Joe and I are good for anyone who's wondering. We are trying to save up for a house but somedays I feel like we are rendered helpless and will never get one. God knows all and we are resting in his arms knowing that His plans are not ours- what a humbling experience! The other night on our drive home from my parents I asked him as I always ask him the hard hitting questions to get inside his head- Why do you want a house as bad as I do? His reply? - so we can start having babies (said with a smile). I chuckled to myself- what a sweet guy!
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